


late nights and street lights

by ongnable (summerela)



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Best Friends, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, I don't know, M/M, Romance, Self-Doubt, but daehwi's sweet, even though he can have a colorful tongue, i'm just writing tags as i go along, it's gonna be an adventure...for you...and for me, oh shit this story became more complicated than i expected it to be, the story will write itself, there's a lot of throwing things and frankly everyone's done with each other's shit, touchy best friends, what exactly is the dividing line between friend and lover
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-03-03 00:46:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13329927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/summerela/pseuds/ongnable
Summary: There are many ways to describe Lee Daehwi but he's sure about some things.He's...1)probablycute2) can handle a lot of shit3) not that fast with realizing the obvious





	1. part 1

**Author's Note:**

> hello everyone, this is my first time writing for wanna one here on ao3 ///// the dearth in jinhwi makes me sad so I'm here to contribute my shit

Sometimes there’s this aching chasm within him.

It fills and springs up a gentle stream that suddenly grows into a full-on river, inundating his breath and thoughts. Relentless, it chases Daehwi everywhere, when he’s thinking about his homework in the shower, when he’s daydreaming by the window at his desk while pondering over his essay, and even when he’s mindlessly taking someone’s order at the coffee shop. It’s so foreign that it frustrates Daehwi to no end. And Daehwi knows everything about everyone but just can’t seem to understand himself at all.

 

“Why does it feel like something within me is trying to eat me up alive?”

Daehwi whines, he knows it’s a bad habit but his best friend doesn’t seem to mind so he gives Jinyoung his most piteous puppy eyes and slumps dramatically onto the table, his face at the same level as his cake. The bakery they’re sitting in has an odd charm to it and like its many patrons, Daehwi and Jinyoung find themselves frequenting its worn but warm sofas and homely, cheap sweets.

Maybe Jinyoung would understand. Maybe Jinyoung could fix this. Afterall they know each other best and Jinyoung has been the mastermind behind resolving Daehwi’s many life crises. This should be a piece of cake for him.

The young, handsome man in question hums while taking a small bite of his fruit tart, fork paused in his mouth as he quirks an eyebrow at Daehwi with a look he hopes to be genuine sympathy. There’s a glint in his dark, grayish eyes before he responds in an amused tone. “Daehwi we know boys don’t get periods.”

Daehwi groans and lets his forehead drop to the table.

He takes it back.

He would gladly trade Bae Jinyoung for Park Woojin, his annoying dumbass of a childhood friend. But lately all Woojin can talk about is Park Jihoon and while Daehwi supports his friend’s budding gay romance, Woojin can certainly have his mouth stuffed with a dirty sock the next time Daehwi hears him make even a peep about how pretty Jihoon’s eyes are.

With a glare which earns him soft laughter and crescent eye smiles, Daehwi pulls himself upright but not before leaning over the table and attacking Jinyoung’s arm with a slap in mock offense.

“Excuse you for kindly knowing the right words to say Mr. Smooth Talker. I don’t even know to put this feeling into context and it’s killing me,” Daehwi’s retort trails off into mumbling as he lets the couch swallow him whole.

In a strictly business perspective, this bakery should invest in new furniture but Daehwi can’t help but think it’s okay for him to disappear into this endless softness. God knows what trash may be under its cushions, but it’s still the closest thing to comfort when his own best friend is giggling at his demise.

He knows he’s sulking because there’s a shift in the sofa cushion as another weight joins him on the sinking couch of doom and he smells a familiar scent that reminds him of home-brewed coffee and slept-in blankets before he’s engulfed in a side hug.

The combination of Jinyoung’s scent and the comfort of the dilapidated couch has Daehwi visibly deflating, like a cat that has found no more reason to arch its back to defend its honor. He buries himself in Jinyoung’s embrace, idly playing with the loose thread that had unraveled from Jinyoung’s wrist cuff.

Jinyoung’s sleeves have always fascinated Daehwi, and rather by an unconscious act of habit than genuine curiosity, the pouting boy makes grabby hand motions and Jinyoung sighs rather fondly, allowing Daehwi to hug his arm while his other arm awkwardly wraps around Daehwi’s back.

“Take care of yourself or you’ll find me over at your apartment with soup and an extra blanket.”

Daehwi rolls his eyes at the threat, “Can you even make soup? Last time we made cookies together, you didn’t know where you put the sugar and I, for the love of everything you hold sacred to your heart, swear all you did was watch me bake the cookie dough.”

He snorts when Jinyoung pulls a frown. “You didn’t even lift a finger, honey. Was baking cookies really that interesting to watch from the sidelines?” Daehwi smiles though when Jinyoung whines against his neck, hugging Daehwi closer.

“Quit whining you turd and help me solve my problem.”

It’s ticklish how Jinyoung’s nose finds its way to Daehwi’s neck so he knocks his head against the other’s forehead to give himself some space from the older’s cold nose attack, earning a yelp from Jinyoung while he mutters.

“Jerk.”

Jinyoung pulls his arm away from Daehwi’s hold and Daehwi sighs, he supposes Jinyoung isn’t all that generous. But instead he feels his body being physically dragged, sliding sideways and up against Jinyoung, who has teasingly used his other arm to chummy it up with the younger – fingers playing with the edge of Daehwi’s sweater.

“Maybe you’re missing something from your life.” He contemplates.

Daehwi turns to look at his best friend, noticing how his usually brooding eyes soften, gaze distant and mind lost in thoughts, while bringing a cup of black coffee to his lips. The younger surmises, with the soft rich brown hair and model-esque features coupled with a heart of gold, Bae Jinyoung is quite the looker and definitely a keeper. If he had a camera, he would want to take a picture of this young man sipping his coffee nonchalantly. But his whimsical thoughts disappear into dust when Jinyoung directs his gaze at him and Daehwi feels something flitter within him.

“More sleep?” Daehwi blurts out.

He's only mildly embarrassed but he has no idea why. It’s objective to think of Jinyoung that way, especially if one spends so much time with the other they’re practically inseparable at this point. His face, however, burns a little but Jinyoung doesn’t say anything indicative of Daehwi’s faint blush, tilting his head in deep consideration.

“I’ll self-invite myself over to a sleepover then. And we’re actually sleeping and not staying up this time.”

The uneasy somersaults inside of him fade and Daehwi grins, “Okay but my apartment, my rules.”

 

If Jinyoung’s dazzling smile in response makes the corners of Daehwi’s lips pull up just a little more, Daehwi would say it’s because Bae Jinyoung isn’t really one to smile a lot and the presence of a smile on those thin lips is a rarity and thus an addictive blessing in itself. Daehwi’s own sunny smiles can’t compare but he can’t help it when he beams back at the other.  
 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Lee Daehwi first met Bae Jinyoung in high school.

 

That was the same year Park Woojin realized he had _no homo_ but actually _yes homo_ feelings towards Park Jihoon, the only other boy at their school who had a worse fashion history than Woojin himself, who seemed to only wear clothes the color of tar. Surprisingly Woojin, the epitome of black clothes, fell for someone who loved matching up extremely different color combinations. But it was paired off with a cherubic soft smile and awkward giggles, and Daehwi could only shake his head at his friend who was instantly a goner.

It was adorable (not that Daehwi would say it to Woojin’s face), to see the two interact around each other.

Woojin was all sharp moves and lazy drawls until he was in the presence of Jihoon, and then he became goo, a clumsy goo that knocked over way too many of Daehwi’s belongings but Daehwi found Woojin’s stuttering to be much too hilarious for casual consumption so he was busy recording some of their exchanges secretly to really yell at Woojin about his broken puppy glassweight.

Jihoon wasn’t any better. From what Daehwi learned from Jinyoung, Jihoon was very rough despite his appearance and had a tongue that said stupid things (Jinyoung’s words not Daehwi’s). But whenever Jihoon saw Woojin, he instantly started fiddling with his oversized sweater paws and kept his words terse.

It’s been a long six years and the two are still not together despite all four of them attending the same university.

But now rather than awkward and hurried conversations shared in crowded school hallways, they communicate through playful shoving and platonic cheek pecks. Again, their words, not Daehwi.

If it were up to Daehwi though, he would’ve used a megaphone and yelled in their faces to grow some balls and non-platonically kiss each other already. But he’s saving his virgin eyes, and perhaps he really is a sadist and enjoys laughing over Woojin’s misery of a supposedly unrequited love.

 

Bae Jinyoung is a different story.

 

Daehwi first found him in the library during midterms season. He had woken up late and sprinted to school with his backpack still open because he had been in a hurry to claim a good window seat to study in for eight hours straight. Instead, he tripped over the carpet and landed sprawling over a boy’s nice leather shoes, the content from his bag spilling everywhere.

Honestly in that moment Daehwi recollects that he must have knocked his head against something because the sun rays streaming in from the windows casted the boy in an ethereal light and he thought the other was an angel descended to help a poor boy like him.

But that image quickly shattered when the other laughed in his face, only then to bend down and help Daehwi up.

That memory still stings when Daehwi remembers how Jinyoung’s first response was to laugh at his distraught and ashamed face but now Jinyoung’s laughter is probably Daehwi’s favorite sound in the world (plus Jinyoung helped him pick up his papers and books so there’s that too, and Daehwi couldn’t help but look like a kicked puppy 24/7 anyways). Fortunately Jinyoung pulled a seat up to his table and the two got acquainted with each other.

So maybe he only spent three of those eight hours actually studying but he gained a dear friend that day.

 

The Bae Jinyoung in school was quiet, expressionless, and kept his head down but the Bae Jinyoung that Daehwi came to know was sunshine and bashful smiles, so soft that Daehwi’s afraid they’ll vanish with an ill-timed flick of the hand or a misplaced utterance of the wrong word. He was lame jokes that had Daehwi muffling his loud guffawing into his hands, even snorting milk through his nose one time (an unpleasant experience for Daehwi but blackmail material for Jinyoung). And he was fragile grace in the moments he opened up his insecurities to Daehwi. His voice, like beautiful silk, embraced Daehwi in sleep whenever he accidentally took a nap at Jinyoung’s house, and more often than necessary, Daehwi would need to remind Jinyoung that he was talented and shouldn’t stop singing.

 

Most importantly of all, Jinyoung held his hand and never let go during the rough times.

Which is why Daehwi stuck to Jinyoung throughout the rest of high school, being extra cheerful for Jinyoung’s sake (and maybe for his own as well, to convince himself stress was a figment of his imagination).

 

His record player of memories halts over one incident. It was sometime in junior year. The stress consumed Daehwi and he broke down, after trying to juggle a part time job, student council, his first rank, and ambitious side musical endeavors. Jinyoung had found him there when Daehwi hid himself by the tree nearest to the back parking lot, with sleeves and frantic hands to wipe away the endless tears streaming down the younger boy’s face. They skipped class that day, two boys collapsed against the tree. One gently running his fingers through the other’s hair while whispering words of encouragement, the other leaning weakly against his chest and hiccupping like a blubbering mess.

 

They don’t speak about that day again but Daehwi remembers his feelings of despair and how they quickly dissipated in Jinyoung’s comforting presence. Even Woojin can’t do that and Daehwi knows that Bae Jinyoung will stay in his life for a long time.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

The sound of knocking wakes Daehwi up.

If his body weren’t programmed to sit up in bed at the slightest of sounds, Daehwi wouldn’t be blasted with mother nature’s free and foolproof waking mechanism aka the warm but awfully annoying sun rays hitting his face, with the additional uncanny rendition of Jingle Bell Rock equivalent in knocks against the front door of his apartment. He doesn’t bother to check his reflection, instead choosing to subject himself to this torture as he drags his limbs out of bed and increasingly closer to the singing that sounds strangely like a Mariah Carey song.

“What do you want.” He deadpans at Jinyoung in all his autumn glory, bundled up in a thick navy blue sweater and black beanie sitting upon his head.

Daehwi suspiciously eyes the microwavable soup bowl in Jinyoung’s hands and as if on instinct he moves to slam the door shut only for Jinyoung to know him better and stick a foot out to catch the door.

“Hello Daehwi I am here to bring you company.”

The brunet flashes him a cute smile before sidestepping into Daehwi’s apartment, whistling as he sets the soup on the kitchen counter.

If Daehwi weren’t cranky for being woken up by Christmas music and at, he checks the clock – ten in the morning, he would have cooed over Jinyoung’s happy mood but frankly he’s a college student with not enough sleep, especially having stayed up until four trying to finish up one of his music compositions because he had to cover the closing shift at work (“ _I’m so sorry Daehwi but Seongwoo fell sick and we’re really short on staff!”_ That’s what Jisung’s eyes said and Daehwi was too soft for Jisung who is the equivalent of all things good in this world. Seongwoo, on the other hand, was all things bad in this world so Daehwi will send him death glares later).

He groans and trudges over to the nearest water source, the kitchen sink, to slap on some water and wash his face.

Jinyoung has other plans however, because he grabs Daehwi’s wrist and drags him to the bathroom.

Too tired to protest, Daehwi allows Jinyoung to manhandle him, closing his eyes as Jinyoung washes his face for him. The older hands him a toothbrush with the toothpaste squeezed on.

“I’m not brushing your teeth so get yourself ready for brunch okay?” Daehwi nods in a sluggish manner, eyes automatically falling shut while he sticks the toothbrush in his mouth. He forces them open just a tiny bit and almost chokes when he sees Jinyoung’s handsome face right in front of him, the latter leaning in a bit too closely.

In the blink of an eye, Jinyoung’s at normal distance again. If only Daehwi’s eyes weren’t half-closed, he would have seen the troubled expression on Jinyoung’s face before they schooled to a more neutral look.

Jinyoung leans over and flicks Daehwi on the forehead before speedily turning and fleeing for the kitchen.

Daehwi is still too tired for this shit but then he realizes something.

“JINYOUNG GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE KITCHEN, YOU CAN’T COOK!”

 

 

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

“Toast.”

“Yes it’s toast Daehwi.”

Daehwi laughs while pulling out the island stool next to Jinyoung before settling beside the other with a small smirk on his lips. “I love how excited you were to get here in the morning just to fix me some toast, which also happens to have nothing on it so I’ll need to spread the peanut butter myself.”

He picks up the toast and bites into it, not bothering to spread anything to make a point. “You know I could have easily made it myself.”

Jinyoung picks up another piece of toast and spreads peanut butter on it, “But knowing you, you probably would have slept until two in the afternoon and then refused to eat until dinnertime.”

He hands Daehwi the second piece of toast wordlessly. “And I don’t want you missing meals baby.”

Daehwi wrinkles his nose at the random term of endearment, but then again Jinyoung has already proven himself to be a bit of an oddball today so he mentally shrugs.

“I wouldn’t have slept that much if I didn’t pick up that other shift.” Daehwi chews on his toast thoughtfully, thinking of ways to make Seongwoo pay him back the next time he sees him; he should probably also throw in a get well card while he’s at it.

He doesn’t notice Jinyoung frown at his nonchalant comment but the sudden movement from the other surprises Daehwi, as well as the hand that is now lifting his chin.

“That explains your eyebags. Do you want me to phone Jisung and tell him that Seongwoo should cover one of your shifts? Or do you want me to talk to Seongwoo?” Jinyoung moves a bit closer, his other hand brushing aside Daehwi’s bangs.

_Why is he acting like such a boyfriend?_

As instantaneously as those thoughts swoop in, Daehwi is just as quick to shake those silly words away.

Maybe he really needs to go back to bed.

“Don’t worry about it. Seongwoo was sick and I didn’t mind taking up the shift. You know, I made the mistake of staying up to finish something else though.” Daehwi has finished his toast and now he’s brushing aside the crumbs on his lips and looking guiltily up at Jinyoung.

Jinyoung knows that he has a passion for music, especially for crafting tunes and interweaving them with lyrics. But Jinyoung also knows that Daehwi rarely sleeps and he is probably the biggest fan of Daehwi and sleep in the same sentence out of their friend group. He’s touched that Jinyoung can be so caring, when all Woojin has done was prod him awake during their advanced math class back in senior year because he needed to check answers with Daehwi on a problem. It’s endearing seeing how much the older genuinely frets over him, but also bothersome at times because Daehwi would rather spend that time doing other things.

So Daehwi pouts because he knows Jinyoung is one weak loser for cute things and he thinks he’s kind of cute to some degree for this to work. He stares unblinkingly at the other, waiting for him to succumb.

In normal situations Jinyoung would laugh at his attempts or push him away in a gentle manner, but then immediately comply to his request right after. The Jinyoung in this moment however follows through with neither of his usual two options.

His gaze has settled directly onto Daehwi’s half puckered, half sulky lips.

Daehwi blinks.

It’s an odd response but he sees it as a challenge so he pouts more and even brings his hands up against his cheeks to amp up his cuteness, determined to win over the soul of his best friend once more.

Suddenly Jinyoung’s face turns a little pink and Daehwi stops his shameful ministrations to stare at him.

The flush of pink is a darling look on his best friend and Daehwi can’t believe that Jinyoung’s unintentional blushing is ten times cuter than Daehwi’s intentional acts of cuteness. He stares in awe at the other, but grows increasingly worried when Jinyoung’s blush only darkens.

.

.

.

He reaches a tentative hand out to shake the other out of his reverie and that’s when Jinyoung snaps out of his daze.

“Sorry I noticed you have bread crumbs on your lips still.”

Daehwi doesn’t have the heart to tell Jinyoung that there’s no way there are still crumbs left but he still brings a hand up to wipe at his lips. “Thanks Jinyoungie.”

His words are interrupted by the sound of the doorbell and Daehwi gets up instantly.

“Forgot to tell you that I also ordered food. You’re welcome.” Jinyoung says while standing up as well, giving Daehwi a slight smile.

The awkward atmosphere dissipates and Daehwi laughs back, “Thanks for keeping me well fed.”

 

 

~~~~~ 

 

Silence is comfortable between the two close friends.

Daehwi had changed into something more comfortable after Jinyoung insisted that the loose t-shirt and shorts look would only land Daehwi in bed with an unavoidable cold. Now cozy in a long white sleeve and jeans, Daehwi finds himself immersed in his readings with Jinyoung by his side. The two of them have spread out their work on the ground, with Daehwi having the hindsight to vacuum and clean the place a few days before.

He had just finished analyzing the last paragraph in the chapter for his introduction to management class before he decided to roll over to Jinyoung’s side to bother the older.

“Why are some people completely oblivious to feelings?” Daehwi watches as the older boy pens his last word before casting a glance warily at Daehwi.

“What do you mean?”

“Woojin and Jihoon. It’s funny that the two of them don’t see what’s in front of them and it’s been like this since my junior year in high school. Now I’m a junior in college and you’re a senior and yet they’re still flirting with each other in broad daylight. And when I call them boyfriends, they deny it.”

Daehwi lies on his back, watching the sunlight cast shadows against the wall behind them. “I just want them to be happy because they obviously like each other.” He turns his head slightly to see Jinyoung looking down at him. “Don’t you agree?”

Jinyoung sits up and stretches, and for a second Daehwi is mesmerized by the tiny band of skin that shows when Jinyoung’s sweater hitches up. He directs his gaze away when Jinyoung leans over.

“I think it’s easier to read other people when you care about them a lot. Because then you spend your waking moments thinking about them, even more so when you’re not together. It’s almost like love but you wouldn’t exactly want to kiss Woojin, now would you darling?” Jinyoung gives him a lazy smirk.

Daehwi rolls his eyes at his response and impulsively pulls Jinyoung down and onto him.

More to suffocate his unbearable, pompous ass than to cuddle. He can’t see Jinyoung’s face but he hopes as the older struggles against Daehwi’s caged arms that Jinyoung’s drowning a miserable death against Daehwi’s chest.

“Eww I would never look at Woojin like that!” With the last blow, he pulls on Jinyoung’s hair.

Jinyoung only graces Daehwi with an undignified squawk and Daehwi can’t help but giggle, letting Jinyoung breathe as the other props his hands on either side of Daehwi.

It earns him a half-hearted glare and an embarrassed glow on his face, but Jinyoung leans down until Daehwi is looking back at him with crossed eyes.

“It’s like me and you, I would hope to think.” Jinyoung murmurs.

There’s something soft about how Jinyoung is now, breathing heavily down on Daehwi but words surprisingly steady, with his hair messy from Daehwi mindlessly grabbing earlier and eyes, surprisingly fond as they look back at him and past the doors that shelter his heart.

But it’s Daehwi, and he has a penchant for feeling squirmy under compliments and ruining precious moments, so he butts his head against Jinyoung and watches as Jinyoung instantly groan and roll away off of Daehwi.

 

Breathing comes easier to Daehwi now and he likes to think it was because Jinyoung was a heavy ass and was squishing the life out of him. A small part of him tells his heart that it was scarily comfortable – the weight of Jinyoung on him, and that Jinyoung was simply breathtaking looking down at Daehwi as if Daehwi knew something that Jinyoung himself was searching for. Daehwi swallows that thought down without another word.

“You’re dumb for not thinking I care about you a lot.”

He aims a light kick at Jinyoung’s shin and cheekily grins when Jinyoung protests. But with a deep sigh, he crawls over and puts his arms around the older in mock sympathy.

“It’s okay boo, I show my love in weird ways.”

Jinyoung scowls at him from his position on the floor and Daehwi sticks a tongue out in response.

 

A lightbulb clicks in his head.

“Hey Jinyoung can we invite Woojin and Jihoon over? We could have a movie night!”

He knows Jinyoung won’t say no but he squishes his weight onto him just in case and starts blowing air against Jinyoung’s ear, taking advantage of his secret sensitivity.

The heavens aren’t on his side this time and Daehwi shrieks when Jinyoung moves to grab his sides, immediately rolling over and initiating a tickle fight. After scuffling around on the floor like a pair of cat and dog and barely avoiding the destruction of Daehwi’s notes, they end up in the same position as before but this time Jinyoung has Daehwi pinned against the floor with his stupidly muscular thighs and it’s probably killing all the feeling out of Daehwi’s legs.

He whimpers like a kicked puppy and tries squirming out of Jinyoung’s hold but shit, he can’t budge an inch. Seeing his efforts are for naught, Daehwi lays limp and peers up at Jinyoung with a glare.

“You’re enjoying this aren’t you?” Jinyoung edges closer ominously before blowing straight into Daehwi’s eyes, reducing the younger’s vision to an unattractive squint.

Daehwi yells and Jinyoung, the angel, gets off Daehwi and lets the younger recover.

“What exactly do you have in mind?”

Daehwi rolls into a sitting position and pats down his hair. He lets Jinyoung smooth the creases from his shirt.

“I’m thinking the two of us,” he jabs a finger into the soft threads of Jinyoung’s sweater, “should play matchmaker.”

“You’re crazy.” Jinyoung says, now reaching up to smooth out Daehwi’s hairs. “Jihoon’s going to throw us out the window when he finds out.”

Daehwi snorts, “And Woojin would kick a soccer ball to my face.” He nearly chokes at Jinyoung’s flabbergasted face. “But it’ll be worth it, don’t you think? They’ll thank us for it, I’m sure.”

Jinyoung gets up and starts putting his papers together. “Do you have a plan?” Daehwi moves to help him.

“Well not exactly but we could definitely watch a horror movie together.”

“But you hate horror movies Daehwi.”

Daehwi shakes his head, “Take one for the team?” He looks up and sees Jinyoung smiling at him. Strange, he thought the other would call him an idiot.

“If you think that’s the best idea, I’ll help.”

Daehwi drops his textbook on the floor and tackles the other, “Thanks Jinyoungie!”

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Fortunately Jihoon and Woojin were free and came over with grocery bags of snacks and real food in tow. Woojin even brought his video games and Jihoon brought a big pillow (“It’s for me and maybe Woojin if he needs to cry into something during the movies-” “AS IF YOU DIDN’T BAWL WHEN TADASHI DIED” “FINE THEN DON’T TAKE MY PILLOW”).

He’s exhausted from an afternoon of dance offs against Woojin and yelling at Jihoon to beat up Woojin’s sorry ass at all the video games. It’s not his fault he prefers Jihoon anyways. Especially when Daehwi got his own Pikachu doll thrown at his face, courtesy of one Park Woojin but Jinyoung, the best friend Daehwi probably doesn’t deserve, aimed Jihoon’s pillow right back and it hit Woojin smack dab in the middle of the face.

The force was enough to topple over Woojin and his friend fell backwards onto the couch.

After that fiasco, Jihoon volunteered to get the food ready while Woojin whined about his face hurting on the couch. Daehwi told them he was going to bring out all his blankets and pillows from his bedroom, but watched from the sidelines as Jihoon sat down beside Woojin and started gently touching his face, murmuring something under his breath. The blush on Woojin’s face made Daehwi squeal but he quickly ran out the room because he didn’t want to interrupt their little moment.

Looks like Jinyoung’s aim wasn’t too bad and it brought the two closer together. Daehwi can taste the sweet drop of matchmaking victory on his lips.

He runs into Jinyoung with an _oof_ and Jinyoung quickly shoots his arm out to steady him.

Daehwi smells a familiar scent, something his brain recognizes but he can’t ever recall smelling it anywhere. He looks up from Jinyoung’s chest and sees the other with wet hair and a towel on his head.

“I forgot what my own shampoo smelled like.” Daehwi dumbly muses, stepping aside to get to his room.

He hears Jinyoung follow him as he starts looking for his favorite pillow.

“It’s nice.”

He looks at Jinyoung trying to dry his hair roughly with the towel and has to hide his grin when Jinyoung pauses and his hair falls into an ungraceful clump.

“Come here.” Daehwi pulls aside his chair and forces Jinyoung to sit down. Rummaging around his desk while humming, he finds a comb and his hair dryer.

“Remember when you used to have black hair and your bangs covered your face? I swore they made your face look smaller than it already does”

Jinyoung instantly groans, looking down and bringing his hands up to cover his face, “Are you still going on about that?” He mutters, “Don’t you dare say it.”

Daehwi takes a shot anyways. “Deep dark.” He nearly shrieks when Jinyoung grabs his wrist and is ready to retaliate by smacking the older, but Jinyoung lets go and leans back into Daehwi with a triumphant smile on his lips and eyes closed blissfully.

“I don’t get it. You’re the happiest person I know Jinyoung. Whoever came up with that rumor hasn’t been graced by your smile.”

Daehwi lets the buzz of the hair dryer drown out his following words. “At least to me, you’re far from deep dark.”

He’s met with silence, and even Daehwi knows he can get a bit too corny at times. But he chances a look at Jinyoung anyways to prepare for the worst grimacing face, only to be surprised when he sees him blushing and hiding his face again behind his pretty piano fingers.

“And you call me a smooth talker!” Jinyoung complains. He lets his hands drop with the clearing of his throat. “My hair now is nicer.”

Daehwi hums to agree. “It makes you look more serious at times.”

He turns off the hair dryer and places it and the comb onto the desk. Parting his own hair, he gives Jinyoung a funny look, “I look like I’m deranged but you look hot with the parted forehead look.” Jinyoung shoves him a little and Daehwi can’t help but giggle.

“Stop it Daehwi, you’re perfect the way you are.” Jinyoung says, reaching a hand out to pinch Daehwi’s cheek.

Daehwi’s about to protest that Jinyoung’s his best friend, of course he’ll put it like that. But a presence in the doorway catches his attention and he notices Jihoon and Woojin staring amusedly at them by the door frame.

 

“How long were you two standing there? Geez give us a warning!” Daehwi nearly smacks Jinyoung’s face in shock at the sudden presence of the duo, mentally apologizing to the other for being too close to his wavey hands. With what he hopes is a threatening but still half-hearted glare, he lifts his chin, daring either Jihoon or Woojin to point out his obvious embarrassment.

“As if we could, you two were completely in your own little world.”

Woojin says before striding over and snatching a pillow off Daehwi’s bed.

Jihoon walks over to them. “So when did you two get together?”

He looks expectantly at Daehwi and Jinyoung, and the two of them stare back in confusion.

“What are you talking about Park Jihoon?” Daehwi watches in alarm as irritation mars Jinyoung’s soft features.

He moves back as Jinyoung sighs and gets up, glaring at Jihoon before stalking over to the door. “Don’t say nonsensical things.” He mutters before leaving the other three in a mild state of confusion.

Jihoon only shrugs at Daehwi while bringing his hands up, “I guess it’s not my place to ask that.”

“You suck!” Jinyoung’s voice booms from the living room and Daehwi has half a mind to run out and ask him what’s wrong.

But Jihoon throws an arm out before Daehwi can take a step, running his hand in frustration through his wavy hair and giving Daehwi a pointed look, “Don’t mind Jinyoung. He’s having a little moment.” He pats Daehwi on the shoulder and grabs a blanket. “We’ll see you outside?” He grabs Woojin by the back of his shirt and starts dragging the young man out with him.

“Oh and don’t forget your fairy lights!” He throws Daehwi a wink, ignoring Woojin’s protests, and walks out.

Daehwi scratches his head in confusion.

Jinyoung seemed annoyed but it isn’t the first time Daehwi has seen him scowling over something Jihoon has said or done. Jinyoung will tell him later if it’s bothering him but Daehwi supposes he’ll need to take precautions and sit by the older during the movie so he doesn’t kill Jihoon.

With lips pursed in deep thought, Daehwi grabs the fairy lights and leaves his room.

 

~~~~~

 

It takes about ten minutes to put up the fairy lights, twinkling lights of red, blue, green, and yellow dancing in and out of Daehwi’s vision, and now with the sun setting on the horizon but the room not being quite dark enough to turn on all the lights, his living room looks absolutely stunning with the blankets laid out on the couches, all his pillows stacked up in the corner, and his favorite lights glimmering from every corner.

Daehwi graciously plops his butt down at the foot of the couch, remembering to place a box of tissues on the table for any possible crying.

Daehwi only recently started getting emotional with movies, which was strange because he had never cried before during his animation marathons and always had to be the one to comfort Woojin during their high school days. Though when Jinyoung joined their movie fest, Daehwi promptly ditched Woojin for the lanky brunet and the two of them usually huddled in a corner making unnecessary comments throughout the movie. By some sort of dumb luck, Jihoon dropped into their friend circle and ultimately ended up as Daehwi’s replacement as Woojin’s cry pillow.

He pats the empty space beside him when he makes eye contact with Jinyoung whose model legs give him purchase to only have to take a few steps over to Daehwi, who scoots over and squishes himself up against the couch so the other male can reach the snacks.

“What movie is it today?” Woojin asks while throwing a popcorn kernel into Jihoon’s open mouth.

Daehwi looks at the scene with an ill-disguised look of half disgust and half admiration, disgust for the possible food mess that may ensue if he leaves the two at it for another hour, and admiration for his friends to be that dumb enough in their affections that apparently pelting popcorn at each other is another way of flirting.

He hears Jinyoung chuckle by his ear and he turns to him, “Are they for real?” He cocks a head at the oblivious pair, only slightly cringing when he sees Jihoon eat a piece of popcorn directly from Woojin’s fingers.

Jinyoung ignores him, leaning over Daehwi to grab something from the table.

“Daehwi has a horror movie ready!”

And there Jinyoung goes, throwing Daehwi under the bus. Daehwi groans, he forgot to tell Jinyoung it was supposed to be a surprise.

He already knows he’s being pelted by popcorn kernels by the time he musters up courage to face Woojin who’s crouched on the couch, holding a pillow and looking at Daehwi with a look of betrayal as if he drowned his pet hamster when they were kids (not that he did – he was only a precocious child who wanted to see if Felicia could swim in tidal currents).

“It can’t be that bad Woojin. At least you won’t cry this time?”

Daehwi ducks his head when Woojin chucks the remote controller at his face. He gasps.

“If you break that, you’re paying!”

“Woojin, stop trying to kill Daehwi. Also this movie has good ratings so it must be worth watching.” Jinyoung picks up the remote and presses a button. “Manage your boyfriend, Jihoon.”

Woojin, sadly, doesn’t have time to stammer out a pathetic response as the opening credits have already started playing.

Daehwi feels a hand on his shoulder and he tears his gaze away from the screen to peer up at Jihoon.

“What movie did you say it was again?” Jihoon’s big eyes are apprehensive in the twilight, owlishly looking back at Daehwi.

“It’s called ‘It’” Daehwi whispers back and he tries to ignore Jihoon’s small noise of surprise, turning back to watch the movie.

 

~~~~~ 

 

Maybe Daehwi should have rethought his opinions on clowns.

He slowly leans back into the foot of the couch, trying to sink his body into oblivion while visibly flinching at the scene of the clown chasing the boy in the library basement. Woojin has already yelled a few times by then, punctuating the times each of the boys faced an ominous embodiment of the clown. Daehwi’s glad he isn’t the one sitting right next to him but he also finds his current seat arrangement slightly uncomfortable.

Curling up and drawing his legs in, he naturally leans against Jinyoung’s side – only noticing then that Jinyoung had been resting his right arm around Daehwi’s shoulders the whole time when Daehwi had been too immersed in the movie.

Seeking comfort, Daehwi grabs at Jinyoung’s dangling hand and starts absentmindedly fiddling with his fingers. If Jinyoung notices, he doesn’t say anything and Daehwi chances a peak at the older. His eyes are fixed intently on the screen and Daehwi gnaws on his lips.

He looks back to pay attention to the next scene, noticing a shift by his side.

“Hey Daehwi.” Jinyoung’s voice comes out as a whisper while the girl screams in the movie because she discovered her bathroom was covered in blood. Daehwi shivers and looks over.

“Are you uncomfortable?” He asks, drawing his arm back to face Daehwi while gazing at him with concern in his eyes.

“A bit.” Daehwi admits. He looks at the couple sitting on the couch and snorts, “I want a pillow to hold but they hogged all of them.”

Woojin had surrounded himself with Daehwi’s pillows and was diligently manning their positions on the couch so they would protect him from the encroaching darkness of the apartment, all the while squeezing Jihoon’s poor arm to death. The older of the two was hugging his own pillow too but he was, in contrast, very enthralled by the movie and only ran a comforting hand through Woojin’s hair whenever the other hid his face in Jihoon’s neck.

If Daehwi didn’t know any better, he would have guessed that Jihoon was only trying to nonchalantly comfort their resident scaredy-cat with soft words of encouragement but when the occasional brightness of the screen hit Jihoon’s face at the right angle, Daehwi can pinpoint a fierce blush that has painted itself over the cheeks of Jihoon’s face with absolutely no hints of said blush fading away.

“Let’s do this.” Jinyoung mumbles and before Daehwi’s fully aware of what’s happening, he’s being moved onto Jinyoung’s lap.

“Jinyoung, what are you-”

“Shh” The older whispers into his ear before resting his chin on the crown of Daehwi’s head. Jinyoung brings his arms to wrap around Daehwi’s small frame.

“Just hold me as a pillow then.” He casually says, clearly not taking no for an answer. Daehwi doesn’t say anything as a response. Afterall Jinyoung’s lap is really comfortable, definitely more so than the floor. If Jinyoung complains about his numb legs later, that wouldn’t be Daehwi’s fault. With a content sigh, Daehwi leans against Jinyoung’s chest relishing in the warmth emitting from his best friend and settling his gaze back to the movie.

 

He really does try his best to not grip Jinyoung’s sweater sleeves too much.

Resigning himself to tracing shapes inattentively on the back of Jinyoung’s hands with his eyes glued to the screen, he doesn’t realize he’s so engrossed in the plot of the story that the jump scare of the clown at the climax has Daehwi jumping and letting out a small yelp.

He instinctively grabs Jinyoung’s sleeve and headbutts against his chin rather painfully and now Daehwi’s clutching his head in one hand and one of Jinyoung’s hands in the other. Too embarrassed by his reaction, he doesn’t notice he’s shaking until Jinyoung’s soft fingers accidentally touch his forehead rather than his hair, probably as an effort to calm Daehwi down. He lets Jinyoung brush his knuckles up against Daehwi’s skin, tittering in anticipation over Jinyoung’s smooth glide of his hand as they part his bangs.

Then suddenly Daehwi feels soft pressure on his forehead and in the darkness, sees how Jinyoung stills, eyes staring back at him in shock.

The sound of the TV has diminished to a muffled noise in the background and Daehwi can only hear his heart thudding against his rib cage. He gapes at Jinyoung who is now looking everywhere but at Daehwi. Now it feels that Jinyoung is the nervous one and not him, and Daehwi hates seeing Jinyoung feeling uncomfortable around him.

It’s probably nothing.

Daehwi doesn’t like to overanalyze intimate acts in fear of making a fool of himself, so he assumes the innocent peck was a sweet gesture and places a hand on Jinyoung’s retreating one.

“Thanks.”

Daehwi misses the responding mumble from Jinyoung because Woojin chooses the worst time to let out a dolphin scream that has Jihoon cracking up and tottering over the edge of the couch.

With a scowl thrown in the dark at the pair, Daehwi controls his urge to knock Woojin upside the head and kick him out the apartment for spoiling that important moment between Jinyoung and him. And although Jinyoung resumes his hugging, politely pulling Daehwi back to his chest, he’s stiff and refusing to make eye contact with the younger and it’s making Daehwi worried.

“Are you okay?”

He peers at Jinyoung, refusing to break his gaze until Jinyoung looks back. His staring must be unrelenting because Jinyoung fidgets a bit before finally turning to look at him.

“Dandy.”

Daehwi leaves it at that, but he doesn’t forget to insult Woojin’s scream while tenderly patting Jinyoung’s arm to let him know everything’s okay.

 _That they’re okay_.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what is going on with Daehwi and why is Bae Jinyoung so smooth??? stay tuned. please just yell at me in the comments. I have other forms of communication but I'm mostly on this site screaming anyways


	2. part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoop whoop I'm back ///// two more installments and then this roller coaster is over. I'm so sorry for not having updated in months - I have certainly not given up on this; I just needed time to focus on academics and other activities. But I hope this update would be well worth the wait. Also hope my 4am writing doesn't look like garbage at this point haha

By nature, Daehwi has never been gifted with much patience. He remembers how fiery his temper gets even as a kid, quick to ignite but just as quick to fizzle out. One time he broke his arm because he was trying to save the neighbor’s cat, and had climbed the old tree sitting in their front yard nearly all the way to the top, only to be stumped because he couldn’t reach the cat (lest he wanted to grab the next branch – much thinner than himself, and possibly die). He resorted to gently shaking the tree to have the cat move closer to him but the stupid feline flicked her tail at him. So logically in his frustratration, Daehwi released his hold on the trunk to tell off the cat (in retrospect, he’s not exactly sure why he thought yelling at the cat would help).

He lost his balance, landed on his arm, and there was that. Now he knows why dogs are better.

It’s not that he is subjected to mood swings – he usually tolerates minor annoyances and irritations (afterall he has survived all those years with Woojin), but some matters set him off like a switch and they usually owe to some greater and deeper reasoning, skirting the bounds of his morals and his beliefs. Fortunately and by some sheer luck, this lack of patience in dealing with ignorant people in his life never reflected on his studies. His unrelenting diligence to pull through all those years of schooling with decent grades, actually bordering on exceptionally excellent grades, have only earned him the respect of his teachers and the admiration of his peers.

And Daehwi doesn’t stop there. He never stops in one place for too long.

It was Jinyoung who saw his potential first, suggesting Daehwi to consider a position with greater responsibility. Certainly Friday nights saw the two boys huddled together on Jinyoung’s bed studying rather than hanging out by the local ice cream shop or at the bustling arcade where most teenagers spent their time. Not to say they never went to the arcade or had their fair share of ice cream; he’s pretty sure the young woman manning the karaoke place knows them by name now with the frequency Jinyoung had in dragging Daehwi there.

Having spent all that time together, Jinyoung knew his habits by then and knew Daehwi had an inkling for what he wanted but sometimes he wouldn’t, _couldn’t_ formulate them into words. It became Jinyoung’s job as his Best Friend™ to pull them out from Daehwi instead and lay them out trustingly in a display of Fate’s cards. So Daehwi ran for school president after only having been a representative for one year, and people trusted him enough at the time that he ended up becoming the first junior president of their high school academy.  

But Daehwi forgets to stop there. He can’t bring himself to stop in one place for too long.

Come junior year, he snagged a job definitely not within walking distance of home. He knew he shouldn’t have worried too much about money, his mom having to constantly remind him of such. However, seeing her eyebags after she returned from work and as she passed by Daehwi’s room to bring him a plate of fruit was enough of a reason for him to look for a part-time job and not solely rely on his scholarship and his mom’s earnings. It builds character, he had said when he had to convince her to let him accept the job. But the owner, Jisung, only shook his head and told Daehwi to come work on the weekends after he accidentally revealed how long of a commute it took to get to work.

Which brings everything to a certain standpoint.

 

Daehwi has never been patient enough to understand what certain actions imply.

He cannot decipher what specific acts convey and probably, for the sake of himself and the other person, needs a word to word explanation for what the other person exactly means. Which is to say his mind has only been a whirlwind of thoughts since that night with Jihoon and Woojin…and _Jinyoung_.

It’s amazing really how Jinyoung and Daehwi are still friends when he really sits down and thinks about it. With virtually no weekends to spend time with each other from junior year and on, and a tired Daehwi who comes back from work only to nap or work on his homework, Jinyoung doesn’t budge from his life. In fact, he drops by with his sandwiches, two slabs of some fancy bread slapped around whatever Jinyoung finds in that mansion house of his, and his constant, comforting company – even carrying Daehwi to bed at some points when he’s too tired and he falls asleep on top of his homework on the kitchen table.

Daehwi doesn’t know whose kingdom he saved in his past life to have Bae Jinyoung in his life, but there’s always that one little voice in the back of his head that tells him he doesn’t deserve all of this. Usually Daehwi squashes that pipsqueak voice, but lately it’s been more persistent than usual.

Jinyoung is probably the most patient person he knows and he finds it amusingly ironic that Jinyoung chose to stick by him out of all people.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Daehwi doesn’t realize the coffee is overfilling the cup and spilling over his hands until Minhyun’s pulling him aside and wiping his hands with a wet towel.

“What were you thinking?” His coworker looks mildly exasperated as he takes the cup from Daehwi’s hands.

Daehwi blinks in response, forgetting he had been in the middle of making a cup of macchiato for a customer.

He looks down at his burned hands as realization hits. “Shit, I’m so sorry!” But there’s no escaping Minhyun’s worried eyes.

“I think I got distracted by something…” Daehwi lets his words trail off, as he directs his wavering gaze back to the front of the shop and absent-mindedly fixes his apron.

It’s not that he wasn’t particularly close to the other black-haired man, a few years his senior, but Minhyun had a piercing gaze that made Daehwi feel uncomfortable. He was sure the man could read him better than Daehwi himself could and having someone else understand him at the same level as Jinyoung could was enough for Daehwi to avoid the topic and pretend nothing was wrong.

He flashes Minhyun one of his cuter smiles, “Don’t worry about it! I’ll take the next customer’s order.” He doesn’t leave Minhyun room for an answer before he sweeps over to the front counter with a customer friendly smile already ready on his lips.

He hears Minhyun sigh behind him, but Daehwi pays him no mind. Hearing the front door open signaling the arrival of a new customer, Daehwi takes his leave. However upon seeing the customer’s familiar face, he tries to quell his scowl.

 

“Give me black coffee.”

Standing in front of him is Woojin with a shit-eating smirk on his face. Daehwi wonders if he finally asked Jihoon out, but that probably won’t happen in another six years.

“Whose canary did you eat?” Daehwi comments while taking the other’s order. He doesn’t imagine Woojin to be so upbeat in the mornings, especially at nine, when he knows the other loves sleeping in. But the grin on Woojin’s face gets wider.

“I know you’ve been wanting to get more cash in to buy everyone Christmas presents so I told Jihoon that you’re willing to tutor Guanlin.” The older says it as if he didn’t just tell Daehwi he signed him up to spend time with a stranger and possibly a kid. Not that he minds kids, but the last time he had to babysit Woojin’s cousin, he got bit on the face because the kid thought he looked like a cinnamon roll. Like what the fuck.

But Daehwi’s a good friend so he decides to roll with it even though he’s already imagining ten different ways to kill Woojin.

“Who’s Guanlin?” There are no customers behind Woojin so Daehwi places his arms on the counter and leans forward, giving Woojin a façade of being interested in what he has to say.

“He’s a transferee that Jihoon found at the basketball courts a week ago.”

“Jihoon can’t even play basketball, why was he there?”

“Shut up Daehwi, not everyone can get the highest score at the basketball arcade okay. Guanlin’s from Taiwan and he’s about your age. He isn’t very fluent in Korean yet but he can speak English so I thought, being the kind Samaritan I am, that Jihoon can make a new friend if you’ll help Guanlin catch up a bit.” Daehwi chokes on air. He hopes his eyes are playing tricks on him because Woojin is trying to act… _cute_ to convince him.

“First, don’t ever do that again.” He lifts an elegant brow at Woojin’s pitiful sputters to deny the accusation. “And second, you’re basically saying Jihoon wants to adopt the kid.”

Daehwi watches as Woojin looks down at the floor while scratching the back of his neck. “Well I like the kid too.”

“You two want to adopt a kid together but you’re not even dating!” He looks incredulously at the blushing man in front of him. Daehwi dodges the punch Woojin aims at his arm, giggling at the frustrated huff of breath Woojin lets out.

“Oh my god. Minhyun, how did you guys hire such a dumb guy?” Woojin pleads to Minhyun who places Woojin’s black coffee on the counter.

“Daehwi is a hard worker but I concede. He is a bit of an airhead at times.” Minhyun shrugs. Daehwi whips around to glare at his coworker. “Wait how am I an airhead when you’re the one who can’t even look at Jisung every time he compliments you? And when he comes to check in on us, he chuckles because you only do so much as smile at him?” Daehwi gapes, internally reveling in Minhyun’s embarrassed face but he’s interrupted by Woojin.

“Takes one to know one.” He chokes on his sip of coffee when Daehwi reaches over and hits his shoulder.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Daehwi turns to Minhyun who nods gravely at Woojin’s response.

“Woojin’s talking about that tall boy that likes to come visit you during your shifts?”

“Yeah, the one who’s walking towards us right now.”

Daehwi looks up and sees Jinyoung making his way, dressed in a large coat with wind-swept hair. He has a soft smile on his face which brightens when he makes eye contact with Daehwi. Looking like a dashing young man, here to rescue Daehwi from the evil –

“Hello Daehwi.”

“Hello Jinyoung,” Woojin and Minhyun chorus together, one in a falsetto voice and other in his regular voice. It doesn’t take much rocket science to figure out that the two are teasing him but Daehwi’s the mature one out of the three in that moment so he does his best to ignore Woojin’s snickers and Minhyun, who wipes down the counter with an amused smile on his lips.

“Jinyoung!” Daehwi beams brightly back at the other man. Seeing Jinyoung always lifts his mood, even in the presence of such shitty company. “Do you want me to make you a special?” He’s already lifting his arms off the countertop to go to the back and make Jinyoung’s coffee.

But Jinyoung’s gaze hardens and Daehwi traces the path of his gaze to his hands which look unhealthily pink, scarring evident from the hot coffee spill earlier.

He’s not sure why he’s nervous but he quickly withdraws the hands so that they aren’t within Jinyoung’s sight. “Oh about that…I spilled coffee on myself.”

Daehwi doesn’t get a chance to protest when Jinyoung gently takes his hands in his. “Why are you such a klutz?” The worrying frown doesn’t fit Jinyoung’s pretty face. “Sorry Minhyun but can I borrow Daehwi for a while?”

 

Jinyoung takes him to the bathroom and Daehwi remains silent as the young man runs Daehwi’s hands under the cold water, drying them softly with the paper towels.

“Jinyoung?”

Daehwi watches as Jinyoung breaks his concentrated gaze from Daehwi’s fingers to peer up at Daehwi curiously through his delicate eyelashes.

“We haven’t seen each other in a few days.” Daehwi softly says, giving the other a quizzical look. He doesn’t mention how it seems that the other has been avoiding him.

Jinyoung’s eyes dart elsewhere, and the gesture causes a twinge of something faintly akin to hurt within Daehwi.

“Sorry, I had a disagreement with my mom over the phone. She’s been bothering me about it so I kind of turned off my phone?” The look Jinyoung gives Daehwi is sincere so he doesn’t prod further.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Daehwi, admittedly, misses having Jinyoung by his side even though it was only a few days. It’s weird to think he could be this clingy.

“Not really. I’ll get it fixed eventually.” Jinyoung quirks a slight smile. “But how did you spill coffee on yourself?” Daehwi laughs lightly at the faked anger in Jinyoung’s voice, but he can detect something else – is it worry?

“I was thinking too much…yah!” He pulls a hand back to hold his forehead on the area Jinyoung just flicked, pouting at the other. “Why are you hurting an injured person?”

Jinyoung coos and leans forward, squishing one of Daehwi’s cheeks. “You’re stupid.”

Daehwi moves to pull his other hand out of Jinyoung’s grasp but the older sneakily interlocks their fingers, making sure to not apply too much pressure. The grasp is loose enough for Daehwi to pull away if he wants to but he finds himself staying in his hold.

“Everyone loves to wound me so. First Woojin, then Minhyun, and now you. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jihoon pops in right now to add another scar to my delicate heart.” He rolls his eyes and pulls Jinyoung to the door. “And now that we established it wasn’t a first degree burn, can I get back to work?”

“Wait a second. My mom would do this to me whenever I injured myself.”

He brings their clasped hands to his lips and gently presses light kisses to Daehwi’s fingers. Daehwi feels his own face burn in embarrassment, but mentally scowls when he sees only a smug smirk on Jinyoung’s face. It’s not fair that Jinyoung can pull this on him and remain unaffected.

“So if I break my own heart, how would you fix that?” He stares at Jinyoung, prodding for any signs in his blank expression that may or may not give Daehwi insight into Jinyoung’s emotions.

 

“I would never break your heart.”

Daehwi stares into Jinyoung’s eyes, feeling his cheeks warm in response to his sweet words. But he’s rudely awaken from his thoughts when Jinyoung steps closer to him. “Well I don’t think I would kiss your chest. But I’ll bring a band aid and put it over where your heart is. If that helps.” He gives an awkward grin.

Daehwi nods mindlessly, suddenly spaced out because of the gentle mirth in Jinyoung’s eyes.

“Hey lovebirds, Minhyun wants Daehwi back in the kitchen.” Woojin struts in, eyes lighting up when they see Daehwi and Jinyoung’s interlocked fingers. “Are you guys finally dating?”

“No!”

“No?”

Daehwi turns to Jinyoung, “You mean that with no question mark though.” Jinyoung’s gaze falls to the floor and Woojin clucks his tongue in impatience.

“Okay whatever. Doesn’t change the fact that Jisung’s probably going to whoop your ass if you don’t leave this bathroom right now.”

Daehwi scoffs. “Jisung would never! If he were to, you would be the first one to get the blame for always distracting me at work. You too Jinyoung!” Daehwi says with a crinkle of his nose. He huffs in exasperation, “now if you’ll excuse me.” He takes a step but gets pulled back, forgetting he’s still holding hands with Jinyoung.

Jinyoung quickly drops Daehwi’s hand as if burned. “Sorry.”

Daehwi stares at him questioningly, “None taken? I still have to make your coffee. More importantly, I don’t think Woojin would make any better company than me.” With a tiny smile, Daehwi reaches his hand out, “I think your hand has healing capabilities.” He’s sure Jinyoung can still see the blush on his face but Daehwi loosely clasps his hand with Jinyoung’s for a brief moment. “Let’s go make your coffee.” He lets go and gives Jinyoung a cute eye smile.

When Daehwi leaves, Woojin turns to Jinyoung.

 

“Wait until he finds out you don’t actually come for the coffee.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

It’s a Tuesday afternoon and Daehwi’s poking at the free milkshake float Sungwoon had given him with the assurance that “it’s on the house for my favorite kid”. Daehwi rolled his eyes good-naturedly but took it anyways because he knows Sungwoon can give a disastrous noogie and it would ruin the nice hair Daehwi has today.

Truth to be told, it’s rare to see the grad student here since he only works two days a week, dedicating his other hours to working on his thesis and singing with his band. Daehwi first met Sungwoon when he and Jinyoung dropped by for an afternoon snack. The result was Jinyoung with a face full of ketchup because the two of them had a stupid bet and Jinyoung ended up trying to eat fries without hands. Daehwi, the blessed best friend, was too busy laughing at the artwork on Jinyoung’s becoming face and didn’t bother to help him clean up. But Sungwoon had swooped in with wet towels to deal with the mess and the two of them got an earful afterwards. Somehow in their interactions Sungwoon took a liking to Daehwi, but that’s probably because both Sungwoon and Daehwi are sadistic creatures who delight in the misfortune of their friends. He likes to call him his little underling and even nags at him like an aunt who’s more invested in Daehwi’s life than necessary. But Daehwi’s gotten used to it. Sungwoon has good intentions anyways.

It was especially funny for a few visits following that eventful one because Sungwoon, who had developed a distrustful attitude towards Jinyoung (for ruining his perfectly good fries that one time), tried to test Jinyoung’s worthiness as Daehwi’s best friend.

It didn’t really take much. Of course Jinyoung won with just one look at Daehwi. Up to today, Daehwi’s not sure how that earned Sungwoon’s trust but the older man always shushes him and says, “One day Daehwi, maybe when you’re as great as me, you’ll find out.” Daehwi has to refrain himself from kicking Sungwoon in the shin every single time.

All in all, Daehwi feels comfortable with Sungwoon and sometimes even gets free food at the expense of his life story.

Too bad Jinyoung can’t say the same because Sungwoon’s just petty like that.

 

With the quiet chatter of the diner as a comforting backdrop to his thoughts, Daehwi has more pressing issues to attend to.

At least now in the smallest off chance that Guanlin is a dangerous kid, Daehwi has Sungwoon to back him up, he muses. He lightly touches the parted hair Woojin fashioned for him an hour earlier, having demanded Daehwi to put in more effort than usual for this meetup. Woojin had thrown in reasons like looking more mature for his age and ‘you looked like shit so-’, and explained how Guanlin wouldn’t take him seriously otherwise or something equally as ridiculous.

_“You’ll understand why Daehwi. Also it doesn’t help that you’ve been looking kind of like a slob the past week.”_

_“Do you want to fight me Park Woojin?”_

_“Ow! Don’t hit me. Jihoon already made me sore because I beat him at his new video game this past weekend.”_

_“Weak.”_

_“…”_

_“Do I really look messy?”_

_“Yeah why?”_

_“Hm no reason. I guess Jinyoung really does look after me well.”_

_“Well…you do have a boyfriend who likes to wear blazers and is studying business.”_

_“Oh shut up. Lying isn’t a good look on you Woojin.”_

_“You mean lying to yourself? Dammit, stop hitting me! Argh here! Wear this black jumper and these jeans so you look casual enough. Don’t forget to smile and not make him feel awkward.”_

_“You’re honestly making this sound like a blind date.”_

_“It’s not! We just want Guanlin to feel welcome :(”_

_“Okay okay. Oh my god stop pouting or I’ll step on you.”_

 

As a result, Daehwi finds himself sitting alone at one of the red cushioned booths of the diner sipping lightly on a strawberry milkshake while warily eyeing the entrance.

Fortunately he doesn’t have to wait long because a young man unfairly tall in stature, decked in a button-up short sleeve and black jeans comes running in with a look of confusion on his youthful face. Daehwi hopes it’s Guanlin and he waves the poor child over with his spoon.

“Daehwi…hyung?” His name sounds hesitant and unnatural on the other’s tongue but Daehwi beams at him and nods. “Hello! And you’re Guanlin right?” He responds in English.

The instant relief on Guanlin’s face would’ve made Daehwi laugh out loud, but since they’re still strangers he tries his best to keep a straight face on as the younger man’s lips curl into a gummy smile.

“You can speak English!” He says with eyes adorably disappearing from the power of his smile. Daehwi does coo this time.

“What did you expect? Did Jihoon not tell you anything?” Daehwi asks while spooning a bit of the strawberry milkshake into his mouth. He watches as Guanlin nervously scratch his ear.

“Jihoon told me a tutor was meeting me at a milkshake place but didn’t tell me anything else. I was worried he was pranking me.” Guanlin mumbles while sinking into his seat apprehensively. Contrary to his tall height, his demeanor now reminds Daehwi of a lost freshman and he can’t help but think screw Jihoon and Woojin, he wants to adopt this kid _._

“That’s not surprising. Jihoon’s a shithead like that.” Daehwi grins to himself when he hears Guanlin’s high-pitched laughter. He continues, “But what is surprising is that I’m only about a year older than you and you don’t need to call me hyung.”

“Oh wow! Did you skip a grade?” Guanlin leans forward with his head perched in his hands. He resembles a dog and Daehwi can already see his imaginary tail wagging up and down.

“Something like that? I came back to Korea before middle school and that kind of messed up which grade they placed me in. But it’s okay or else I probably would’ve ended up with a different group of friends.” He looks up from his milkshake to see Guanlin tapping his finger on the table.

“Hey do you want to order something? I’ll stand by you and help you when you get stuck!” Daehwi suggests. He sees that Sungwoon is still on shift; maybe he can also introduce Guanlin to someone new.

Guanlin makes a face akin to a child rejecting vegetables, slightly tripping over his Korean. “I can order stuff. My best friend loves food so we go out and eat a lot together. But I did want a milkshake.”

Daehwi shakes his head in amusement, “Let’s go work on your Korean.”

The two of them head to the ordering counter and Daehwi ducks his head when Sungwoon reaches over the counter to ruin his good hair.

“You’re too quick kid.” Sungwoon frowns, looking disapprovingly at Daehwi with arms crossed. “Explain why your hair makes you look like you’re trying to rush an exclusive business frat. That seems more like a Bae Jin thing than a Daehwi thing.”

Daehwi rolls his eyes. “Why can’t I afford to look nice for once? It’s not like I’m coming in here in a suit to eat fries. I know Jinyoung did that one time but he was in a hurry and he was dying from hunger. When will you ever let my best friend live?”

“Never.” Sungwoon sniffs. He suddenly sees a gangly kid loitering by Daehwi’s side. Said kid gives him an awkward hand wave. “I see you brought someone new this time. What’s your name?”

“Hello sir, my name is Lai Guanlin.” Guanlin bows his head a little and Sungwoon stares, markedly impressed.

“So you finally introduce me to a good boy, Lee Daehwi. Bae Jin-who?” Sungwoon smirks.

He gives Guanlin a kind smile, “I’m Ha Sungwoon and I make sure Daehwi makes smart decisions,” He points a finger at Daehwi who’s inspecting his cuticles in a bored fashion, “But clearly he doesn’t appreciate my advice and now has ran off with the demon child – Bae Jinyoung. Instead, Lai Guanlin, you can replace him and come to me whenever you ever need someone to talk to.”

There is silence as Guanlin’s eyes dart between Sungwoon’s hopeful eyes and Daehwi’s jaded gaze.

Daehwi breaks the silence with three broken claps. “You do know I was best friends with Bae Jinyoung three years before I even met you.” Guanlin watches in alarm as Daehwi suddenly starts sniffing, “Why can’t I love both my best friend and my favorite auntie? Why do you have to tear this family apart?”

Sungwoon barely bats an eye at Daehwi’s acting. “See how he likes to pretend he doesn’t know me? Please, I’ll treat you to milkshakes and the like.” Sungwoon dramatically flings himself over the counter while giving Daehwi a _those are fake tears you bitch_ look.

Daehwi tries to squeeze out more nonexistent tears from his horribly dry eyes, but starts laughing out loud when he sees the horrified look on Guanlin’s face.

“Oh my god, I don’t mind. We’re just kidding here. Sungwoon has a stupid grudge- ” _“It’s not stupid! People shouldn’t waste food!”_ “- against Jinyoung. I only get slightly irked on behalf of my best friend but since I get free food from Sungwoon anyways, Jinyoung can keep suffering a bit more. Besides I always share the free food with him so.” Daehwi shrugs.

“Cool.” Guanlin utters out, still a bit baffled by what the hell happened in the last five minutes. “Do I get a free milkshake then?” He looks trustingly at Sungwoon with a childish grin on his face.

Sungwoon groans, “Just this time. Daehwi’s ruining my wallet. He’s high maintenance, mind you Guanlin.”

Guanlin laughs, “It’s okay. Daehwi seems like someone fun to be around. Jinyoung must be lucky to have him as a best friend.”

There’s a strange glint in Sungwoon’s eye that Daehwi chooses to ignore but he stares suspiciously when Sungwoon leans in to whisper something to Guanlin. He shrugs, at least the two are getting along fine. He helped Guanlin make a new friend!

“They’re _really lucky_ to be with each other this whole time. Like a match made in heaven?” Sungwoon says in a quiet voice. Guanlin’s face lights up upon understanding the Korean. “It’s like 緣分 which is like fate. The two of them are fated.”

“Fate or not, they are each other’s most important person.”

Guanlin slowly nods his head and watches as Daehwi scroll his phone, face lighting up as he texts a message back to someone.

“I wonder if it’s like that for me and Seonho.” He muses but then frowns because he remembers something, “First love? Nah. Seonho’s love for food would probably win over me anytime. And I can’t give up basketball for Seonho.” He blinks away his thoughts, “This is too confusing. Feelings are confusing. I’m just a growing boy who needs his milkshake.”

He shakes himself out of his reverie only to still see Sungwoon standing there, surreptitiously trying to look over Daehwi’s shoulder to see who he’s texting too.

“Wait shouldn’t you be making my milkshake sir?”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

It’s nearing the end of the semester that Daehwi truly remembers how much he hates school. Despises the system of congregated testing, piled up altogether with end-of-the semester reports and projects. The holy mother grail of pain, disappointment, and stress all culminated into pieces of paper that will mark the supposed progress of one’s education.

He laments over being an engineering student, staring wistfully out the window of his lecture hall across to the art building where the studio art, architecture, and theater & film students spend their time into the early hours of the morning shut up in their workshops with nothing but themselves and their creativity. At least they’re working on something enjoyable. Not like the shit Daehwi does every hour.

He stares at the equations swimming mockingly within his tired vision and with a groan, slumps over onto his desk.

Daehwi barely makes out the figure of Jinyoung placing a cup of tea on the corner of Daehwi’s desk, blearily blinking a greeting at the brunet who looks like he’s fared far better days than Daehwi has.

Jinyoung turns to him after he drapes his coat over the back of his seat and takes out his laptop, facing Daehwi with a raised eyebrow, “Statistics still the bane of your existence?”

Daehwi bites back a sharp retort, remembering Jinyoung graced him with free tea. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.

He takes a sip and wills away his negative energies that seem to collect exponentially at this point of the semester. “How do you even enjoy this class?” He coughs when he accidentally takes a large sip and scalds his tongue. Jinyoung pats him on the back and immediately draws circles of comfort. “As a business major, I can’t believe you chose to take statistics as your math elective. You could’ve chosen an easier course. Ever heard of intro to calculus?”

Jinyoung scoots closer to Daehwi and looks at the problem set on the younger’s desk, “I mean I could’ve but then I wouldn’t share any courses with you.”

He frowns and Daehwi wants to lean over and smooth the furrowed brow, but he slaps his hand before he can. Jinyoung looks at him weirdly.

“I like studying together, although it seems that most of the time you’re only yelling exasperated expletives at the problems. It’s still fun. Being together.” Jinyoung pats Daehwi’s arm consolingly. “I can also help?”

“In conclusion, you only chose to take this class to make me feel like a bumbling idiot.” Daehwi mutters, sliding down into his seat so only the top of his head can be seen.

“Baby, you’re not an idiot,” Jinyoung coos, hugging Daehwi…or rather hugging Daehwi’s head. “I never mind helping you. Why don’t we work on that problem set that’s due next Monday at the library today together? After your last class ends at five?” He pets Daehwi’s hair as if he’s a kid that needs reassurance.

Daehwi stiffens minutely at the word ‘baby’; afterall it’s not the first time Jinyoung has called him that but Daehwi can’t help but waver a bit over the fact that Jinyoung’s treating him awfully weird these days. But no matter. Finals are stressing him. School is stressing everyone. He might as well be convinced it’s Jinyoung being an ironic asshole and not being lovey-dovey out of nowhere. It makes more logical sense this way and costs less on Daehwi’s overworked mind.

He doesn’t check his calendar. He’s probably scheduled to cry at five in the afternoon anyway, in a corner of the library away from the judging eyes of the elitist, “I clearly always have my shit together” students.

Daehwi solemnly pulls himself up and stuffs the sheet of paper into his backpack before turning to Jinyoung with a genuine grin.

“What did I do to deserve you?” He flings himself into a hug and Jinyoung catches him while laughing.

“I could say the same about you.”

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

“Look at what they give you and try to categorize the equations so that you know which ones require which variables. Sometimes you’ll need to calculate values with simpler equations before plugging them into one of the more complex ones.”

Daehwi nods, looking back at the problem. “This one looks like it needs several steps.” He frowns, “Hey give me the formula sheet again.” Jinyoung passes him the sheet and kicks back, observing Daehwi from his seat.

There’s an earned comfort in what is deemed as familiar, Daehwi absentmindedly ponders while robotically inputting the values and scribbling the answer. You can already foresee what will happen as a response to one’s action because of that safe boundary that exists between what’s okay and what isn’t. And if you can’t predict it, at least you know you won’t be judged. It’s usually the ultimate state of peace in friendships and relationships. A sought for equilibrium that emerges after your heart learns to beat in rhythm with the other, when actions and facial expressions start to convey far more meaning than spoken words can bring justice to.

In the presence of Jinyoung however, the same flood of feelings slowly begins to drown Daehwi again. A hard to swallow feeling that surfaces every now and then that he can’t pinpoint. It swims behind his rose-tinted view of his friendship with the other. And in moments like these, when Daehwi can sense Jinyoung’s heavy gaze on him, he can’t help but choke at the creeping emotions that threaten to submerge him under.

It’s overwhelming. Daehwi drops his pencil and lets his head fall into his hands, rubbing wearily at his eyes. The skid of the chair is just as instantaneous and suddenly there are warm hands everywhere, cupping his face and lightly skirting his forehead, and Daehwi takes in a deep breath of Jinyoung’s cologne.

It doesn’t help that Jinyoung’s panicked voice is louder than what his pounding headache can take. So Daehwi, giving Jinyoung a blank stare and placing a finger delicately against the other’s lips to shush him, closes his eyes and rests his head slowly onto Jinyoung’s shoulder.

Funny how this intimate contact quells the incessant surges within Daehwi, calming and effectively stopping the earlier storm like a sturdy seawall. An unlikely antidote to his problems Daehwi thinks with a whimsical smile on his face, unconsciously cuddling closer to Jinyoung. The warmth is welcoming and Daehwi can’t stop himself from bringing his arms up to hug Jinyoung. The feeling is reciprocal and Daehwi feels Jinyoung card his fingers gently through Daehwi’s hair.

But the peace is short-lived. Daehwi hears murmurs and the deep rumble of Jinyoung’s voice reverberates against Daehwi’s fatigued body. He peeks a look at the intruder and sees a shy Guanlin looking embarrassed as if he witnessed something he shouldn’t have.

Oh wait.

Daehwi flings himself off Jinyoung with a start, eyes widening in horror.

“Guanlin! I completely forgot I was supposed to meet you today at the library. I’m so forgetful, oh my goodness. Let me make it up to you!” He mutters a quiet sorry to Jinyoung who tries to ask Daehwi what’s going on. With surprising alacrity, Daehwi packs his bag, apologetically throwing Guanlin glances as he gets up and walks over to the taller man’s side.

“Jinyoung, this is Guanlin. I’m helping him get situated in Korea since he can speak English. And Guanlin, this is my best friend. The one Sungwoon talked about last time.” Daehwi pinches the bridge of his nose after his hurried introduction, forgetting that the two have never met yet. He had been so busy with school that he hadn’t explained the situation to Jinyoung. Not until now. For some reason, he nervously eyes the two hesitantly shake hands. Daehwi lets out a sigh of relief when Jinyoung ends up giving Guanlin a pleasant smile. Guanlin returns the smile, face brightening up at the welcome.

“Okay then, I won’t hold you two from your prior engagement.” Jinyoung says in the same pleasant voice as reflected in his smile. He looks at Daehwi while organizing his papers, “Will you be okay with the problem set?” He momentarily casts a worried glance over at Daehwi.

“Hyung, you have a problem set due? Do you need more help on it? I can help you if it’s math!” Guanlin swings an arm around Daehwi’s shoulder and gives him a cheeky grin. It’s endearing that the younger really wants to help him and Daehwi has to bite back his sassy quip about how the material is probably not within his capabilities. He can’t help but smile fondly at Guanlin before turning back to Jinyoung to respond.

His best friend looks frozen. What had initially been a worried expression plummets into something more neutral and almost cold, a mask so foreign to Daehwi. He furrows his eyebrows and blinks. But Jinyoung is looking down as he packs his notebooks.

“Yes I should be okay. Thanks Jinyoungie.” Daehwi tries his best to smile but it comes out a bit stifled. “Are we still getting dinner?”

Jinyoung looks at his watch and only Daehwi, who suddenly feels uncomfortable – far away from the shores of what is safe and familiar to him, finds the lull in conversation a bit unnerving.

“Ah, I think I need to discuss something with my mom.” Jinyoung gives him a strained smile. He heaves his laptop bag onto his shoulder and throws them a wave. “I’ll be going now. Take some medicine for your headache Daehwi and don’t forget to drink water.” Daehwi watches weakly as Jinyoung leaves, energy robbed as if Jinyoung took his zeal and liveliness with him when he walked out the room.

“You can get dinner with me,” Guanlin offers, misconstruing the despondency in Daehwi’s expression but nevertheless doing his best to comfort the older. Daehwi gives him a small smile.

“Okay but are you paying for me?”

Guanlin frowns, “Did I end up being friends with another foodie who likes to suck my wallet dry?” His genuine, distressed face makes Daehwi burst out in laughter, an effervescent bubbly feeling that makes him forget what transpired before with his best friend.

“Don’t worry about it. Just pay for my dessert.” Daehwi says softly, looping his arm with Guanlin’s flailing one.

“I’m losing something either way, hyung.”

“What did I say about calling me hyung?” Daehwi pretends to scold, but he sees Guanlin roll his eyes and something small but warm tugs at his heart at seeing the younger acclimate seamlessly into their banter.

“Maybe I should treat you as someone younger since you’re so small anyways.”

“Hey!”

 

While Guanlin nurses his hurting arm (courtesy of Daehwi’s strong slaps), Daehwi thinks about his new friend and about Jinyoung. Guanlin would very easily fit into the dynamics of his friend group; Daehwi could already imagine him and Guanlin teaming up against Jihoon and Woojin. Jinyoung would also love Guanlin, Daehwi can sense it. But he’s not so sure about anything anymore, especially not after seeing the brief flash of hurt in Jinyoung’s eyes.

What’s left for Daehwi to do is to make it up to Jinyoung somehow. He doesn’t know why his heart squeezes almost painfully when he’s with Jinyoung, nor does he know why spending time with his best friend gives him the utmost of happiness. But he knows what Jinyoung did back there wasn’t his usual self, and Daehwi’s set on fixing whatever mess he created.

With that new resolve, Daehwi puts on a brave face and tells Guanlin.

“I’m going to order the most expensive dessert on the menu because I’m a man on a mission. So prepare yourself Guanlin.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Regardless of how strong Daehwi’s resolve is on asking Jinyoung what exactly happened that day, if there’s something Jinyoung wants to tell him regarding his serious talks with his mother, and why Daehwi feels like simultaneously dying and living when he’s in the presence of the other (or merely even thinking of the other), Jinyoung isn’t cooperating with Daehwi’s plans.

He’s pretty sure at this point that Bae Jinyoung is avoiding his best friend and classmate, Lee Daehwi, and even the Lee Daehwi he made a promise to in high school to always talk out anything that bothered him. Dispirited and all too ready to stop seeking the young man out and to wait for him to come to him instead, Daehwi stops chasing the other after he so much as sees Jinyoung from the corner of his eye. His attempts have gone for naught and maybe, maybe Daehwi was wrong. Jinyoung needs space from Daehwi. Perhaps he’s aggravating his situation more than he’s trying to fix it.

Friday morning comes with a fresh shower of rain. It would have been a welcoming change to the somber, gray clouds that graced the days that preceded it, hanging heavily over Daehwi as if reminding him that nothing was going right at all – not in school, not in his relationships, not even in his health, but Daehwi’s mind is cluttered. It has been so for a good week.

He runs out into the rain without an umbrella, already too late judging by the time to go back and grab one. His persistent sore throat only worsens, and by the end of his last class, Daehwi’s resting his poor forehead defeatedly on the coolness of the desk. The lecture hall is empty save for the few stragglers, but Daehwi’s too busy ruminating on his thoughts. Jinyoung has even skipped today’s statistics class, having not sent Daehwi a text of his absence. Frustrated, Daehwi glares through his hazy vision at the empty seat next to him. With a final groan, he peels himself off the cool surface and finishes packing up, leaving the hall and dejectedly looking out at the rain as he exits the building.

At this rate, he’ll be soaked and sick. Daehwi chuckles. He’s already sick, he might as well get soaked and return home, take some medicine and cry his pain away in his warm bed. With a quick prayer to his handwritten notes, Daehwi takes off his outer layer and throws it over his head to sprint back to his dorm. Something stops him though before he can take a step.

Someone has grabbed his wrist, and Daehwi struggles against the hold to get a clear view through his dizziness of whoever stopped him.

It was Jinyoung.

Standing there in his dry suit and a quiet, but undoubtedly concerned look on his face. It’s ironic how he looks so well-kept, in an expensive suit and immaculately styled hair while Daehwi looks like a mess, his limp sweater on his head barely holding together his dignity and tears.

“You’re running a ridiculous fever aren’t you?” Jinyoung says, almost accusatory. He moves to stand closer to Daehwi, even makes a move to take off his jacket. But Daehwi steps back, squints angrily at his supposed best friend.

“So you finally decided to show up?” He mutters quietly. ( _Where were you? I was worried._ )

“My mom scheduled a meeting last minute and I couldn’t skip.” Jinyoung sighs wearily, and for a second, Daehwi wants to let go of his defenses and hug Jinyoung. But he can’t. There’s just too much left to be explained.

“Can we talk Daehwi?” And there he goes, looking as if everything was okay and that nothing has unmistakably shifted in the past few days between the two of them. But Daehwi swallows the unease, the questions, and nods his head slowly.

“Okay not here. Let me walk you back to the dorm?” Jinyoung looks almost sheepish when he takes out a big umbrella and moves to open it, taking Daehwi by the shoulders quite naturally.

Daehwi doesn’t say anything, instead choosing to watch Jinyoung as the older fumbles with taking off his suit jacket and putting it on Daehwi. His actions are gentle, as if forgetting that Daehwi only has a minor cold and isn’t bedridden. It makes Daehwi blush, knowing that Jinyoung at least still cares for him.

 

They walk to the dorm in silence, the droplets of rain hitting providing a monotonous rhythm to their pulsating thoughts. Daehwi’s in a daze by the time he finds himself sitting on his bed in a thick sweater, wrapped up in his blanket with his head covered, Jinyoung fussing about and complaining about how Daehwi needs to seriously take care of himself.

But how can he take care of himself when Jinyoung is feeling hurt and having issues with something to the point that he’s blocking Daehwi out? He frowns and puts out a hand to stop Jinyoung from pacing yet another round in worry.

“Why are you here?”

 

There’s nothing but the fire boiling the pot of water Jinyoung had left on to make tea. But all Daehwi can hear is the rush of the sea within his mind, crashing relentlessly against the delicate seawall. It’s barely holding on.

Daehwi's barely holding on.

Jinyoung bites down on his lip at the question, runs his fingers through his hair, and looks Daehwi dead in the eye before kneeling down.

“Would you be my boyfriend, Lee Daehwi?”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you need to yell at me, I dare you


End file.
